Puzzle of Self: Part Two

I hope you’re settling into this new year well.

And if you’re struggling with this new beginning-remember it’s only a calendar, (the Gregorian calendar) and New Years festivities are just modern ways of marking time. Time that we’d prefer not to march on if we’re grieving…

In this culture there’s such a focus to let go and start over at this time of year. But we’re still in the depths of winter! (in the northern hemisphere anyways). And you can’t let go of what you lost so easily.

For me it makes more sense to celebrate new years around mid-winter or Imbolc on February 2nd. This is when seeds begin their slow growth upwards towards the sun.

So instead of making resolutions and intentions, what about asking yourself-what still needs your attention? What’s in the darkness that still needs tending?

I invite you to have a simple grief intention by giving it attention. Set up a small grief altar and tend to it-sit and meditate, emote, and write in your journal there. 

And let’s take time to be in this dark stillness by being with your grief creatively. 

In my last blog I wrote about a creative prompt called Puzzle of Self. 

I encourage you to take your time with these prompts. It was intentional to not give you everything in that first blog. With enough time the insights and ah-hahs arrive naturally. That’s when the wisdom comes; when there’s no pressure to understand it all at once.

Also, with big grief, the answer to WHY comes much much later. We go on a quest, an apprenticeship to grief that we didn’t want to take. It’s an unexpected detour; a soul sabbatical. 

So take your time with these prompts and come back to them when you feel ready.

In this blog, I give you more ways to deepen your process with your puzzle of self. If it’s helpful, write in your journal about what comes.
 

• What part was easier for you to do? Why? 
• How did it feel to find the images you used? 
• Did you rip up or cut up your images? What was that like? Did any insights arise as you did this? 

…

I tore up an image of red rocks because that’s what the rock looked like where Michael fell. I placed these red rocks upside down because our world went upside down.

I also tore up an image of an old man’s hands, which then looked similar to the red rocks. 

After I was done, these large hands and red rocks appeared to be holding us. We were being held all along by healing hands and the earth, even though it didn’t feel like it at the time.



 

• Was your piece divided into pre/post grief images? Or were some images crossing the middle bridging the two?
• Was there one image that pulled it all together?
• If you could talk to the original images-what would they say? What would the ripped up parts say? And what would that final image say to you?
• If the final piece could give you a gift that would help you move into the future-what would that be?

I am Michael torn into four pieces-his hand holds strong. 
I am the accident-a man upside down falling off his mountain bike. 
I am one whose dreams of having a child were ripped up.
I am Italian travels torn in two.
I am pieces of a man’s hands. 
I am upside down red rocks and blue sky.
I am broken through the middle and still putting the pieces back together.
And yet I am also strong; I am woman proudly carrying her staff and sword. 
I am practical silver hiking boots, grounded on a trampoline as I navigate all the ups and downs. 
I am an emerging white house covered in green growth. I am green healthy shoots and regardless of all the destruction, I am growing.
I am one with an abundance of wings; I am butterfly, moth and eagle. 
And despite it all, I soar.

You’re essentially writing your image into a poem.