A lot of pessimistic people treasure the phrase “Those who can, do. Those who can’t, teach.” We all know that’s not true. Everyone I know has had at least one teacher who the best doer they ever met.
“Those who can, do. Those who can’t, teach.” We all know that is not true.
At the moment, I am immersed in a five day grief ritual with Malidoma Somé from the Dagara Tribe in West Africa. The guides at this retreat, as with all the others I have attended recently, are consummate instructors. The tools I learn with each session are not only useful for me as a grief coach and companioner, but as a human being dealing with my own struggles. I can confidently say that with each training/retreat, I am diving deeper into my own grief work as well as gaining more tools on how to hold space for others. Grief work is soul work. As such, I have been moving at a slower pace than usual, and I am still taking in and digesting everything I am learning. And wow, is it ever a lot.
We need to reclaim that phrase above, but tweak it slightly.
“Those who can, do. Those who have done, teach better.”
Progress on my online grief relief course is on track. So far, it consists of a mindfulness and embodiment process for how to befriend your grief. I teach about the myth of grief being in “stages” and share a more realistic map to work with — I call it the “mess of grief.” We spend time learning how to tune into the body and pay attention and I introduce some mindful breathing and embodiment practices (which will keep expanding and building as we progress through the course).
One thing I am especially proud of is something called the “Bottoming Out Audible Breath of Grief.” And for those who need it, even an audible breath where I encourage students to play around with saying the word “fuck” on the outbreath. All of these things are things I had to do to help myself with my own grief process, so it is natural to me to guide people along a similar path, while helping them make the journey uniquely their own. In the end, everyone will find their own way. The important thing is keeping the grief process moving. That’s where I come in.
That’s it for now. I just wanted to let you know what I have been up to and if you follow me on Facebook/Instagram, I have been especially quiet this past month due to my personal dives into my grief process once again. Keep your eyes here and on the Facebook page for updates and photos.
Be well, and remember to keep moving both inside and out…